The Art of Letting Go …

Sometimes life has a rather peculiar sense of humour.

I’ve spent quite some time trying to write this month’s newsletter about the art of letting go. I explored different ideas, stories and perspectives. Nothing quite came together. Until I finally stopped trying so hard.

In other words, I finally let go. 😊

And rather unexpectedly, two stories began to connect … one about an ancient Chinese rainmaker, the other about a world-famous rock star.

What could they possibly have in common?

Story one – The rainmaker

An old parable, shared by psychologist Carl Jung, tells of a village suffering from a terrible drought.

The crops are dying, the people are desperate, and every attempt to bring rain has failed.

Eventually, the villagers summon an old rainmaker from another region.

He arrives, looks around and asks for a small hut where he can stay undisturbed.

For three days, he does absolutely nothing, at least as far as the villagers can see.

No elaborate rituals. No sacrifices. No spectacular rain dance.

And then, on the fourth day, the rain comes.

The astonished villagers ask him how he managed it.

He explains that when he arrived, he found the village out of harmony. Being there had disturbed his own inner balance.

So he withdrew to the hut, not to make rain, but to restore harmony within himself.

And when harmony returned, the rain came.

Story two – Alanis Morissette – Thank U

In 1995, Alanis Morissette released Jagged Little Pill. It became one of the best-selling albums of all times.

Yet behind that success, she was exhausted. After 300 performances over 18 months, she stepped away from the music industry.

She had achieved what so many people dream of achieving. Fame, recognition, commercial success.

But something was missing.

In a 1998 interview with the Los Angeles Times, she explained that she had expected external success to bring peace and self-esteem. Instead, she discovered that those inner needs remained unresolved.

She took an extended break, reconnected with family and friends, explored spirituality and travelled to India.

Her experiences in India challenged something fundamental … her belief that life was about achieving, succeeding and staying in control.

But her transformation wasn’t simply the result of visiting India. She also needed time to process her experiences, including several weeks of solitude after returning to Los Angeles.

And then something beautiful happened.

She began creating music again.

Not because she had successfully forced herself back into productivity, but because inspiration had returned.

In a 2004 CNN retrospective, her collaborator Glen Ballard recalled how naturally the music flowed when she returned to the studio. One of the songs that emerged was Thank U. I recently came across it again while watching The Way, a touching film about a father walking the Camino de Santiago after losing his son.

What makes the song so moving is that Alanis doesn’t simply express gratitude for life’s pleasant experiences. She also thanks life for its difficulties … disillusionment, vulnerability, fear, consequences and even terror.

And then comes a remarkable reflection about letting go.

“The moment I let go of it was the moment I got more than I could handle”

“The moment I jumped off of it was the moment that I touched down”

Perhaps she hadn’t needed to achieve more. Perhaps she simply needed to stop for a while.

Two very different stories, separated by centuries and cultures. Yet both seem to point towards something remarkably similar.

Perhaps letting go isn’t about losing something. It’s about making room for something we couldn’t find while holding on so tightly.

The Rainmaker stopped trying to change the weather and attended to his own inner balance.

Alanis stepped away from the relentless demands of success and gradually rediscovered her creativity.

Neither story is about giving up.

Both remind us that sometimes the answer isn’t more effort, more control or another attempt to make things happen.

Sometimes we need to take a step away.

Is there something in your life right now that you’re desperately trying to make happen?

Something you’re pushing, fixing or trying to control?

Perhaps what you need isn’t another attempt to make it rain.

Perhaps it’s time to step into your own little hut for a while …