dealing with stress

What is done is finished – “Feierabend”

Joerg Kuehn · May 27, 2021 · Leave a Comment

My favourite Buddhist monk and comedian, Ajahn Brahm, once told the story of a fellow monk, who was overlooking the building of a new hall in his monastery in southern Thailand. The work progressed very well until the beginning of June. That’s when the rainy season sets in, usually lasting until October. During this time, the monks stop doing their regular work and spend more time in contemplative study and meditation. It’s often referred to as “Buddhist lent” or “rain-retreat.”

As the daily monsoon downpours began, the abbot ordered a stop to the work on the construction site and sent all the workers home.

It happened that during that rainy season some visitors came to the monastery and saw the unfinished building and the abbot sitting quietly in reflection. With no builders in sight, a visitor asked the monk when the construction of the hall would be finished. The abbot without any hesitation answered, “The Hall is Finished!”

How are you really doing?

Joerg Kuehn · Apr 28, 2021 · 1 Comment

20 year old Jonny Benjamin was not well. He had been diagnosed with a mental illness which caused him to slide into a severe depression, and, on a cold January morning in 2008, he decided to end his life. Dressed only in a T-Shirt, he walked up to Waterloo bridge in London, stepped over the railing, and was ready to go.

But all of a sudden, a stranger came up and started talking to him: “Hi mate, can you tell me why you’re sitting on the bridge?” Gloomily and hopelessly, Jonny replied he was going to take his own life. But the stranger would not let go and kept talking to him. “Please don’t do this mate. Please don’t do this. Let’s just go for a coffee. Let’s just talk it over.” The stranger kept talking to Jonny in tones full of compassion, kindness, and genuine concern.

3 wonderful tips for our “groundhog-days”

Joerg Kuehn · Feb 24, 2021 · Leave a Comment

It was the first of February when weatherman Phil Connors, together with his producer Rita and camera man Larry, made their way from Pittsburgh to Punxsutawney, where, on February 2^nd, a groundhog named Phil predicts whether spring will come early or winter will continues its icy grip for another 6 weeks. German speaking immigrants initiated the tradition of groundhog day back in 1887.

Connors makes no secret about his dislike for the trip, as he finds the small town with its narrow-minded people “so uninspiring.” His plan is to get done with the groundhog day report quickly in order to be back in Pittsburgh for the 5pm news. But life has different plans for the obnoxious weather man as he enters an endless loop of waking up day after day at 6.00am to Sonny & Cher’s, “I Got You Babe” … and the same day he lived through the day before … with the same people doing the same things.

That’s how the movie Groundhog Day, starring Bill Murray and Andie MacDowell, starts out.

Could this trick help us through the tough winter ahead?

Joerg Kuehn · Oct 28, 2020 · Leave a Comment

It was a lovely evening on 25th May 2005 in Istanbul. One hour before the Champions League Final between AC Milan and Liverpool FC, coach Rafa Benitez, began to share the line-up for the Liverpool team.

After hearing the seventh name, Didi Hamann realised that he was not in the squad for the probably most important game of his career. Later in his bestselling book, The Didi-Man – My Love Affair with Liverpool, he would describe that moment as follows: “My stomach churned. I did not hear anymore after that. I was on the bench. It hit me like a hammer blow.”

Hamann continues: “I have to thank my previous coach, Gerard Houllier, for how I was able to deal with it. Gerard used to say: ’If you are not selected for the game, you have 2 minutes to get over your disappointment. Then you get your head up, as if you were going to play and prepare yourself!’”

The game starts with Hamann on the bench. And what a game it was. AC Milan totally outclassed Liverpool and seemed to be able to score at their leisure. Not even one minute was played when it was 1-0 for the Italians. Playing like they were “from a different star,” they added another 2 goals to make it 3—0 when the half time whistle blew.

Everyone thought, “That’s it. Game over.

The answers are inside – not outside!

Joerg Kuehn · Sep 30, 2020 · Leave a Comment

It was the 3^rd of September 2003 when Medical Manager CEO Michael Singer received a panic call from his division’s attorney. The FBI was raiding his R&D facility, along with several other locations across WebMD, a publicly listed company in the field of health information services. The FBI confiscated 1.2 million email messages, 1,500 boxes of files with more than 3 million pages of documents, and 830,000 computer files.

A few weeks later the reason for the FBI-inquiry became clear. It turned out an employee, who was internally investigated for taking dealer kickbacks, had informed the authorities about his dealings, alleging the company board was fully aware of these illegal affairs. He was hoping to cut a deal for himself.

Despite Michael Singer’s career as the CEO of a division with more than 2,500 employees, he lived a quiet, spiritual life in “the woods” where he moved in his early twenties to learn “how to quiet the voice in his head.” All his life, he had been practicing “how to surrender” and create “inner peace.” This federal investigation offered a massive challenge to his inner peace. If things turned out badly, he might end up in prison.

dealing with stress

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