JK Executive Coaching

Just another WordPress site

English Blog

Two Yogurts In A Fridge

· · 2 Comments

Think of an incident when someone else’s behaviour was so appalling to you, that it triggered a stark emotional reaction. Maybe it was someone acting selfish, rude, greedy, arrogant, mean, inflexible, etc. Anything come to mind?

As part of my psychotherapy studies I came across an interesting psychological concept recently, which taught me an interesting lesson… revealed in two yogurt containers.

The lesson is all about shadows, which, according to Carl Jung, “exist as part of the unconscious mind and are composed of repressed ideas, weaknesses, desires, instincts, and shortcomings.”

This is the darker side of our nature we don’t really want to acknowledge. The shadows contain all the things that are unacceptable to society… and to our own personal morals and values. That’s why we don’t want to acknowledge them!

[Read more…] about Two Yogurts In A Fridge

Why not quit my job?

· · 2 Comments

It was the 24th of November 2013. I was working as supply chain Director for Procter & Gamble, just about to complete my coach certification with the International Coaching Federation (ICF), and I was totally confused. I knew I had to make a difficult and life-changing decision. Should I become self-employed, moving into coaching, where my passion clearly was?

I was scared and completely lost about what to do. I was constantly making two different lists:

  1. Why I should quit my job!!!
  2. Why I should not quit my job?

I was going nowhere, until I came across the following questionnaire by Tim Ferris. On the evening of November 24, I sat down and put my thoughts on paper in answer to his 5 key questions. I had no idea it would change my life.

[Read more…] about Why not quit my job?

Nobody is an island

· · Leave a Comment

Quite some time ago I came across the following song by the German songwriter Gerhard Schöne. It takes the form of a parable.

Many years ago, a man arrived at the gateway to heaven. As he had lived a good and humble life, he was pleased to stand outside the glowing gates of heaven, ready to ascend into the light and love of the afterlife. But there was a thought he struggled to let go of.

The gatekeeper, being quite observant, noticed his hesitation and asked the man: “What is bothering you, my friend? You seem troubled. Is there unfinished business?”

“Not really,” said the man. “Everything is sorted just fine down there, but I find myself wondering what hell is like. I never really believed in heaven or hell all my life, but now, I am really wondering what it looks like.”

“You may be surprised.” The Gatekeeper smiled: “As with all great truths, it’s not as simple as you may think, yet also, far simpler. Let me show you.”

[Read more…] about Nobody is an island

Is it a threat or a challenge to you?

· · Leave a Comment

‘‘The test you will take today is designed to help us identify people who are exceptionally weak in their problem-solving reasoning abilities. Your performance on this test will not be scored like most normal tests, but rather will be classified as either above or below a predetermined cut-off score. If you score below that cut-off, this suggests that you are exceptionally weak —in other words, well below average in your problem-solving reasoning abilities. Thus, this test and the scoring method used are designed only to separate those who are especially weak from everyone else.”

This is how Dr. Chalabajev and her team introduced the test to participants of group 1 in their study about how people deal with performance anxiety. Group 2 was introduced differently, with the underlined words replaced as follows: weak by strong and below by above. The intention was to trigger fear in group 1 making participants feeling under threat, by being at risk of getting classified as “especially weak”, whereas help group 2 to identify the test as a challenge where they could potentially be identified as “especially strong” problem solvers with not much else to lose. In scientific terms group 1 was targeted to become “goal-avoidant” and group 2 “goal-approaching.”

The study results* are in my point of view mind boggling:

[Read more…] about Is it a threat or a challenge to you?

What if failure were not an option?

· · Leave a Comment

Benjamin Zander is a conductor for the Boston Philharmonic Orchestra and a professor at the New England Conservatory of Music.  For more than 25 years, he faced the same problem.

He noticed most of his new students had this nagging voice in their heads, saying things like, “Oh Lord, this guy must be really good.  No way I can be as good as he is.  And what if I’m not?  What if I’m not very good at all?  I’m not sure I can do this!…”

The result?  Zander noticed many of them would not reach their top potential.

Why?  It wasn’t a lack of effort.  They worked frantically, but not from a good mental and emotional place.  They stayed in a constant state of anxiety and fear over how their performances might be judged.

[Read more…] about What if failure were not an option?

Please connect here: